I am sitting here with tears streaming down my face as I learn of the death of one friend and the sickness of another. I sit here, healthy, watching my children play, even arguing amongst themselves about petty things such as "he touched me!" or "he's bothering me!" I watch them, feeling how blessed I truly am.But there are questions...why do I get to survive an ordeal when one didn't and one may not? Why am I so special? Doesn't God know that those 2 women were and are amazing?
I know that in the last few years, I hadn't even known one friend was sick and with life being ...well...life, I hadn't even picked up the phone or sent an email to her wondering how things were with her. Did she even know I had thought of her? Did she know how much her past acts of kindness to me while "I" was sick made such an impact on MY life? ...touched me in ways no one else has?
In 2000, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and during my recuperation at home, this friend made sure that my children had their 'wish' and sent them things I couldn't afford because she thought they should have something. She never asked me, she just DID it. My daughter, who is now 20 and an adult herself, still has what she sent.
Granted, I lived through it and have been cancer free for awhile now. But she wasn't so lucky. She died this past Christmas Eve. I didn't get to show her the same kindness that she showed me all those years ago. As selfish as that sounds, I didn't get to say 'thank you' for everything she did for me, for everything she did for many, many other people out there. And most of all, thank her for being...her.
Another friend is just beginning that same journey. I am grateful, as odd as that sounds, to be given the opportunity to be there for her. To show her just how much she means to me. To let her know that she has NEVER been taken for granted and that I love her truly.
God has given me this gift...and I am grateful for it. However, I really do need to say thank you to "her" ...the woman who, even in death, has shown me that it is never too late to say it...so...."thank you Jennifer Lee Topousis...for just 'being'...." Rest in peace, my friend, and know...you will never, EVER be forgotten.
