Yeshiva or bust....

The date is September 15, 2009, and I hold in my hands, the acceptance letter into a Yeshiva program. Which basically means that in a period of years (not too many, I hope), I will take my place among those, such as Sally J. Priesand, who became the nation's first female rabbi (1972) and others like her, when I become a Messianic Rabbi. It feels so surreal, even though I have the confirmation to prove it. When all is said and done, I will have a Bachelors in Bible with a focus on Messianic Judaism, a Masters in Theology and if I feel ambitious, a doctorate in divinity. Then it will be on to ordination.

Can you imagine it!? ME?...a Messianic Rabbi!? What would my mom and grandma say...? Would they approve...? I wish I knew...

...fast forward to this morning when I woke up and wondered what I was thinking. I mean, I am 43 years old, changing careers (sort of), and wondering if I can really learn all of this.

I look at the text that I am reading and think, "Can I really do this?" or "What ARE they talking about?" or "Am I smart enough?" or ..the MOST important..."Am I dedicated enough?" I know the answers. I know what other people would tell me. I even think I know what God would say. Faith...I have to have faith that He's guiding me here for a reason. He's led me through so much already that I have to believe...no...I DO believe that He has a plan. It's just so much bigger than I am. I'm just a small piece of the puzzle. All I can say is "Thank you, God, for allowing me to become that piece."